Trump Bans Muslims Over The Big Bang Theory?
Trump's infamous Muslim ban has everyone up in arms, and up in legs. As many outlets have pointed out already, the countries that have lost their immigration opportunities have not had citizens connected to terror attacks in the U.S. Others have noted that Trump left off countries that have had citizens connected to past terrorism activities, and that those countries have business relations with him. So this begs the question of why the ban? Well, we got the scoop.
Our sources close to a white house, literally a guy standing adjacent to a nonspecific white house, tell us that the real motivation stems from his love of The Big Bang Theory .
This revelation makes the Trump presidency even scarier than we thought. Yes, he wants to ban all Muslims, but this confirms that he enjoys The Big Bang Theory . Our sources in a white house have multiple tapes of Trump expressing his love for the show.
Trump: That Big Bang Theory show. What a great show. That Sheldon is so funny, so great. He's terrific. It's the best show with the best people. Penny is so beautiful, so beautiful she reminds me of my stunning daughter Ivanka. I love to goof with my friends, the best friends. I grab their wives with my big hands all the time and say Bazinga!
Wow, what a revelation. But how does the ban influence his favorite show? The character of Raj Koothrappali. The tapes confirm that Trump cannot stand Raj's inability to talk to women for most of the show's existence.
Trump: That Raj is a loser. He can't talk to women. Me, I talk to women all the time. I love looking at women. Touching women. Looking at women while touching other women. That's why Hillary lost so bigly. Her fans say "I'm with her." That's one vagina. I'm with multiple vaginas. Raj is losing and it's time for this show to start winning with the women.
The President's plan would see that actor Kunal Nayyar would be deported and not granted reentry, however, Nayyar is British-Indian and not a Muslim. Whether this oversight will be taken into consideration is yet to be seen. A rumored alternative would see that, in addition to a wall, a yuge draw bridge would be built as the only entrance into the United States. This would allow Steve Bannon to control immigration in a more natural position, troll that lives under the bridge.
As for how the show would have moved forward in Raj's absense? Sources say Trump supporter Scott Baio would have been added to the cast. Overtime his character would have been written as the new lead developing into a spinoff The Bigly Bang Theory .