Mike Pence is Hiding Something From the American Public
This Presidential election has called for a destruction of political normalcy and an overall change to Washington. People no longer want lying politicians to run their country. They want change. They want real change and with the results pouring in Tuesday night it is evident that they got what they wanted. But one change people didn't think would result from this election was the use of the term VP. VP is commonly know to stand for Vice President, but this year is different. Thanks to Mike Pence, this year VP stands for "Very (much likes) Penis"
It is more than certain that Mike Pence is 100% a closet homosexual. You're probably saying, "Rob, there's no way. Pence is the straightest man in America." Wrong. He's the gayest man in America. Trump'a right hand man has come out calling homosexuals the catalyst to a "societal collapse" that will add to the "deterioration of marriage and family." He also says being gay is a choice and that restricting gays from marrying is an enforcement of God's will. And to top it all off, he has suggested the idea of so called "conversion therapy." The one and only thing that I can conclude from this is that Mike Pence HAS to be gay.
I'm not a psychologist but I've taken two psychology courses in college and have smoked weed before, so therefore I'm qualified to be one. Based on my psychological analysis, there is no reason for someone to care so much about someone else's actions, especially if they do not effect themselves personally. The idea that a person feels they have the right to change someone's beliefs simply because they do not concur with your own is also preposterous. The one logical reason seems to be that Mike Pence is a closet homosexual. It seems that Pence is so bothered that people in the LGBTQ are so at peace with their sexuality that it makes him question his own sexuality. If you have to question you're sexuality, you're probably, sorta kinda, maybe just a little gay and there's nothing wrong with that. It seems that the liberation of human sexuality brings too much of a temptation to Pence so he has to stop it. It's just like a fat person on a diet: You can't eat that pizza near me because then I'll want pizza and I can't have pizza because it's against my beliefs. Replace "pizza" with "dick" and you have an insight into Mike Pence's brain.
As a straight man, I would like to offer an olive branch to Mike Pence. We accept you, even if you are gay. You can still watch football, drink beer and eat steak. There's no difference between me and you. We're both Americans. We both breathe the same heavily polluted American air. It's time for you to just come out of the closet as a Jesus loving gay man. I'm sure Jesus won't mind. He was probably gay too.
P.S.: Take a look at Mike Pence and tell me, with a straight face, that he fucks women. There's no way in hell.